I am a take-charge, get-it-done, fix-the-problem sort of person.
As someone who identifies as a “helper,” it can be really difficult for me when there is truly nothing I can do. Which is how, perhaps, the people around you feel if you are job hunting right now.
Are you getting suggestions, requests for status reports, or even random encouragement that feels like an arrow instead of a helping hand?
If so, you are not alone. Just ask my family! I am famous for my unsolicited advice – perhaps why I do what I do!!
And, thanks to my family, I have some (unsolicited) advice that has really worked for us. It hasn’t been easy for me, but it’s improved our relationships and helped me relax so I don’t overstep. These apply to job hunting, and a lot of other circumstances as well (relationship status, health issues, you name it!):
- Recognize that the inquiry/advice is coming from a place of love
- Give status reports before being asked, which puts you in control
- Give the “helper” something to do. Anything.
- Plan a regular time to be together when everyone agrees the hot topic is off the table
And if you are the “helper” I’ve got some advice for you as well: Be with your discomfort. Action doesn’t always fix things. Sometimes there is nothing we can do, and our attention is better focused elsewhere. Turn toward something that gives you energy and see where it takes you!
Cheers to your career!